The Hope We Seek
Seeing Me at The American Visionary Arts Museum
“You’ve got to use whatever past you came from as part of the origin story that shapes the hero you will become.” – Chris Brogan
Traveling is an opportunity for inspiration, enlightenment and renewed hope. When The American Visionary Arts Museum in Baltimore, Maryland advertised their current exhibit, “The Hope We Seek,” I was curious. A need to reward my soul after a professional accomplishment was all the excuse I needed to head to Baltimore.
Known as a place to display the work of intuitive, self-taught artists, I didn’t understand the depths of my first visit to this museum until three-fourths of the way through the gallery. Before the visit, I thought I was going to treat myself. During the visit, I believed I was drawn there to view these artists and discover my legacy. I found myself delightfully amused, entertained, visually stimulated and inspired by the range of colors, textures, poems, sculptures and quotes abounding in this artistic space.
Having lived in Baltimore before, I never travelled behind Inner Harbor to see the city’s vast hidden treasures. My excitement and inner amusement turned to a spiritually paralyzing moment of epiphany as I traveled down one particular hallway.
Terrence Howard’s imaginative work was on display with a carefully crafted written bio expressing his vivid, personal dream life. When he is awake, he creates visually inspiring pieces which reveal his artistic and technical abilities. His gift is so powerful that he tapped into the scientific theories of another expert who died six years before his birth. Howard has created sculptures that illustrate his own theories of physics and they mimic a famed, scientific predecessor, author and sculptor known as Walter Russell.
My soul resonated with the facts: Howard had a vivid dream life – I did too. Howard is a self-taught artist (not just an actor), unknown to the larger world – I was too. Howard is a man guided by a divine force. I am too.
Next to his exhibit was that of an African-American Southern visionary artist known as Minnie Evans. She used colored pencil on paper to create captivating drawings as revealed through her dream life. Her work spoke to my hidden fears and doubts about my own drawing capabilities. Evans, like all the other artists in the museum, was self-taught. This fact spoke to me and said, “If they can do it, you can too.” I felt a spark of hope ignite in my belly.
Also, many of the artists came from dysfunctional family backgrounds that revealed histories filled with mental health issues and substance abuse. During their childhood, their parents encouraged them to stifle their natural talents and gifts and steered them toward careers for which they had no interest. This was my story too.
However, these individuals rebounded to honor and follow an inner force to create beauty, embrace their uniqueness, which, in turn, allowed their creativity to leave a legacy of courage, inspiration and hope.
There were many artists who had done self-portraits. I had threatened to do my own about six months prior, but had never started. In fact, I had ditched the idea. It was then I changed my mind. It was my turn to be my own hero. My turn to show up in my own life and create whatever speaks from within my soul.
Howard, Evans, Jimi Hendrix, Ted Gordon and Robert R. Hieronimus, Ph.D., also graced the walls of this same passageway. Walking this hallway was me literally being physically ushered through a spiritual transformation that birthed me into a new phase of self-awareness. I was transforming, yet again, towards the butterfly I am and always knew I could be: a creative writer, artist, editor, poet, painter…and who knows what else. A winged woman of many colors.
Then, in this same hallway, I saw the word that I use to describe myself – mystic. I was in the hallway with other mystics. It was then, I cried. I’m not crazy. There are others like me.
I can face myself. In creating what my soul speaks, I am responding to a strong inner desire to be my own hero. This museum revealed to me it was okay to be me. The experience also allowed me to embrace my unique self and realize, even my life is in divine order. A renewed sense of hope about who I am and what I can be was discovered at The American Visionary Arts Museum.
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