I am aware that I could’ve written about one of my favorite vacation spots, places where I feel I can lounge, relax, and regroup. However, when I think of a place that helps me feel brave and inspires me to save the day, no place stands out more than my mother’s house. Just to clarify, my mother’s house is not where I reside. In fact, I have not lived with my mother since I was three years old, a mere young one! Ever since then, I have lived with my grandparents in Pfafftown, North Carolina, a small, friendly town just outside of Winston-Salem. My mother resides in Graham, North Carolina, a small town outside of Burlington. Now, obviously, this is not very far from my home. Yet, emotionally, it is quite far from me.
I have been separated from my mother for most of my life. It’s not great, but hey, I’ve gotten used to it. What I have not, and will not, grow accustomed to is being separated from my two younger brothers. Hakim, the older of the two, is ten years old, friendly, and bubbling with enthusiasm! The younger of the two, James, is seven years old, just as enthusiastic as the former, and very, very loud. The physical wall that has separated us from each other is not the only characteristic that makes my brothers unusual and different; they are both autistic. To me, this is a difference that can be sad, disturbing, and yet also adorable; it is a difference that I have accepted easily and with open arms. I have taken them under my wing, so to speak, and when I go to visit them, we do practically everything together.
When I see my brothers, mentally and verbally handicapped, and educationally and communicationally stifled, I feel the strongest motivation to be brave, a desire I always attempt to share with them. And saving the day?? The day I want to save is tomorrow…the tomorrow that my brothers will have, the tomorrow that they could have. Who knows who they could be? Autism is a disorder, quite a powerful one. But it is not powerful enough to stop thoughts, dreams, hopes, and aspirations. It can’t be!! If it is, then what is the point of life? What is the point of life if you are to be stopped by a handicap or the ones you love are to be stop by a handicap? Seeing my brothers inspires me to want to do something, anything to save their day. Their yesterday, today, and tomorrow. Their yesterday because I insist that they not have fought through all of the obstacles they have faced in their young lives, all of the tough times and struggles, for nothing. Their today because when I see their faces, their smiles, their frowns, and their tears, I am moved…not only moved, but forced, to do something to help them. Their tomorrow because each time I say goodnight to them, I promise myself that I will make tomorrow a better day for them than today was. Tomorrow must be their day! And I must save it. I do not know how I will, I do not know when, but one tomorrow will be saved, one day they will have what they want, need, and deserve.
These feelings that seeing them brings upon me are not just basic emotions, such as sadness, happiness, love, and determination. They are all a very strong feeling, one that I sum up as bravery. I must be brave for them! If they are to believe the things I believe about them, they must see that I believe them! They must understand who they are, who they were, and who they can be. Not who they will be, but who they can be. No one’s future is set in stone. And my brothers’ futures are definitely not set in stone if I have anything to do with it, if I can save their day. I must. And for this reason, I can find the strongest, most viable reasons to be brave when I am in Graham, North Carolina.
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