Not every person who passes through this life intentionally deposits misery on their fellow traveler, but conversely sometimes we unintentionally bestow grace.
The impact of an encounter, 15 years ago, still hums in my mind. A gentle reminder of this fact, “what difference did it make” is not always answered completely or immediately but “you should have” invariably has a certain and rapid conclusion. Let me explain, the small persistent voice within us, which stops us in our tracks, is never inappropriate or late.
One autumn evening , I made a quick detour to a self-serve recycling machine. While some might have considered it risky, I knew the area was well lit with enough activity from shoppers. As I neared the end of my chore, I heard voices. There was a deeper female voice and as I turned around I saw a couple of men. While the men weren’t shouting her response was loud. As I was evaluating a possibly unsafe situation, I realized she was deaf and speaking loudly due to the open air space. I faced her and began communicating in her language. Surprised, but now calmer she answered my questions. The conversation lasted a few minutes, and I learned she was living on the street. I asked if she need a ride somewhere. No, she was ok. She explained she lived in the fenced-in area behind the grocery store. My heart sunk. It was only a matter of time before she would be harmed while sleeping. I asked again if she needed help. No, she said, as she straightened her frame firmly and resolutely as if to reassure me she was safe, strong, and invincible. Keenly aware I was outnumbered I decided to leave and quickly drove away.
However, I could not dismiss the fact this young lady was gravely in danger. I knew she was a ticket for some “friends” to tap into her disability income but if someone needed more than she had she would be at risk to be harmed. Slowly my distance from it all grew, one block, another block, now a stop light. How could I help her? I had no free time. There was no public transportation up the hill where I had an empty-problem home. Darn. I turned the car around and sped back, she was there but not the others. I told her she could stay at my place for the night. It’s too dangerous on the streets. Part of me hoped she would say no, instead she hopped in my car. As we drove down the same road I had just left, she rolled down the window and yelled to her “friends” walking in the opposite direction. They ignored her. I said a prayer “Oh, Lord let her see the significance”.
As we drove I explained I had a sick father and I could not pick her up until ten or eleven the next morning. I would try to figure a way for her to get down the hill on a regular basis but I did not know how long she could stay. She was agreeable. I don’t know why she trusted me. She revealed it was a fight with her family which caused her to leave home.
We drove about two miles, then we started up the hill for another ½ mile. My mobile home sat on a view lot at 1400ft elevation. The area was only lit by the moon.
I told her she could not smoke, the area was high risk for fire. She opted to sleep outdoors on the patio which was screened-in with a spectacular view of the city lights and valley. I cautioned her not roam around at night, rattlers and bobcats did prowl the area.
It had been a complicated morning and very hard to break away to go up the hill, just to bring her down. This was not feasible. I was devastated. I doubted if one night away from the streets would change her mind. I pulled up to my house and looked around, aware she would not hear me and I might startle her. She was sitting on the outer patio. She was quiet as we drove. I apologized but I did not have a consistent schedule to get her up and down the hill. She said it was ok. I asked if she slept well. Yes, she replied. I begged her to go home. She ignored me. And then she said something I will never ever forget. I took four baths. FOUR? I asked. Four, she repeated.
I think of her often and wonder if the solitude of the hill for a night was enough to make a difference. Enough to resolve the cause to leave home. Enough to separate her from the rebellion of the street
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